Felony Fun

I love Virginia law. If a criminal defendant is charged with "larceny of a dog" (or certain other animals), you don't have to prove the value of the animal. However, in order to convict someone of the crime of "larceny of poultry", you must specifically prove that the poultry taken was worth between 5 and 200 dollars. See Va. Code § 18.2-97.

The significance is that larceny of poultry is a felony, while under normal larceny rules, stealing something worth less than $200 is a misdemeanor, with significantly lower penalties and no loss of civil rights such as voting and gun ownership.

So conceivably, if a particularly scrawny chicken was stolen, you could have an expert witness battle involving whether the chicken was worth less than $5 or not. Welcome to Old Dominion.

Somehow this is not as surprising as it should be

Matthew Murray's ATI past

There seems to be a lot of talk regarding whether the curriculum itself was to blame, or the parents, or just "sometimes you get a bad apple." For my two cents, you have to be careful about thinking that you have "the answer" for how to educate. Children have different needs, and when you fail to account for the individual challenges of each child, you fail to show the love they need to feel a part of the "community" of their family. That and you probably lack the humility to recognize that others (who may not believe exactly the way you do!) may know better or be better equipped to meet these needs.

The Ones That Didn't Make It

In the course of researching today, I came across a link I thought rather interesting - the texts and histories of the constitutional amendments not ratified. There are only six of them, but several of them can still be ratified (including a child labor amendment which only lacks 10 states, but appears to be largely superfluous now that Commerce Clause power is so broadly interpreted). So, for a quick look at the ones that didn't make it, click here.

Virginia to suspend licenses of 5% of drivers?

Article Here

The Virginia General Assembly State Auditor has just released a report stating that nonpayment of the "abuser fees," civil penalties automatically accruing to Virginia drivers upon conviction of reckless driving, drunk driving, and other traffic misdemeanors and felonies, is prevalent. As the fees range from $250 - $1,050 per year for three years, the idea that people simply don't have the money to pay the fees and accordingly don't is believable. Nonetheless, only 13% of the fees assessed for misdemeanors are paid, and only 5% for felonies.

(As a side note, I am not actually sure why the law included the felonies, as it's hard to pay your fines if you are sitting in prison and the extent of your economic activities is trading cigarettes for protection.)

The Auditor's conclusion is that the DMV may have to suspend 300,000 Virginia licenses in the coming year, or more than 5% of the total number of current drivers' licenses. I don't recommend disobedience, but it does appear in this case that if nobody pays it, what are they going to do?

There are several legislative proposals in the hopper for this year, so it will be interesting to see what happens. For a possible judicial solution to the matter, see the model brief (which is not necessarily in the form as I would present it, but to each his own, and I haven't written my own) available here.

Link of the Day

Here you may find a well turned satire using the anti-alcohol logic: On the Holierness of Tea-totaling.

I also appreciate the commenter there who mentioned that moderation-vs-abstention had interesting results when applied to the field of sex.

Practice tip

(After receiving repeated calls from an individual who apparently believed it was currently the 1940s)

"Rule number one, when doing mental commitment hearings: never give your client your business card."

--The firm's first-named partner

You know, some systems of law are really better than others

If there is one thing that is easy to criticize about Islamic law, it is its treatment of women. For instance, rape is seldom punished because unless further witnesses corroborate the victim's story, the victim will be punished - severely - for adultery, having confessed to engaging in sexual activity but failed to prove unwillingness or a perpetrator. There is thus a strong disincentive to raising the matter at all.

This week, however, a Saudi court proved that even reaching a conviction isn't enough. In this case, a woman managed to secure the conviction of the men that gang-raped her 14 times one afternoon. Although the "up to ten years" they will be spending in Saudi prisons are surely no joke, this is a mere slap on the wrist for a country where swiping a wallet costs you a hand. However, the woman will be spending some time in the clink herself, as well as receiving 200 lashes. Turns out that in the process of testifying against the mass of defendants, she had to admit that she had *gasp* been in the car of a man not her relative (that was where she was raped - apparently scienter is not a critical element of the crime of being in a car with a man not your relative).

But women's rights and other substantive issues aside, there is another aspect of this case that indicates the trouble the Saudi legal system is in: as part of the appellate court's decision, they suspended the woman's attorney for undertaking the appeal. Not only do they have draconian punishments and a lack of substantive rights, but they punish those who attempt to stop (or just actively monitor) the railroading of these people. With such a disincentive to even run interference on the prosecution or level of punishment of anyone presupposed to be guilty, why even bother having a "justice" system?

It does illustrate, though, why the lawyers in Pakistan are so demonstratively upset about threats to the post-British legal system they have. They can see from their neighbors where the loss of a confrontational legal system leads.

Article here

Please do not feed the Benjamin

©2007

Used by Permission

(Benjamin is a guy at our church who is deathly allergic to peanuts. When he was little his parents made the title of the post into a sign for him to wear in the nursery. He has since outgrown the nursery, but we still label things that go to church, so as not to knock him off.)

The things they come up with...

Concept cars, usually created by auto manufacturers to show the artistic direction their models are going, are usually very interesting to look at. Not so much the above Mazda Taiki, unveiled recently at the Tokyo Motor Show. The high, ungainly lines and curves say "Half pimp-mobile half Indycar, after getting a Redneck lift job." It might be cool to drive to a Star Wars convention in, with a little Palpatine plush doll in the rear "window," but I have a hard time imagining driving this vehicle with a straight face. I can't even imagine how much fun it must be to change one of the rear tires. If I had to provide a tag line for this entry, it would read, "With any other car, you simply hit a deer. We chop it into steaks for you."

Rocky the Frying Squirrel

Article Here

Given my enjoyment of mischief and destruction, an article about a squirrel blowing up a car (even if posthumously) is too good not to pass on. In the roadkill wars, this rodent deserves a Croix de Guerre. (Hey, there is precedent for animals receiving that award...)

Cross-examination fun

Thanks to Judge Buchmeyer for the following exchange in a Texas trial:

Q. On the day that Twine was shot, were you intoxicated?

A. I definitely was not.

Q. Had you been drinking that day?

A. I drank a few beers.

Q. How many beers did you drink?

A. About thirty.

Q. And you were not drunk?

A. No.

Q. What is your definition of drunk?

On Nobels

Gore uses the Force: "I find your lack of faith in global warming... disturbing."

I am still trying to figure out what "educating the world about man-made climate change" has to do with the purported purpose of the prize criteria: outstanding achievement in understanding or ameliorating human conflict. Armistice negotiations, protesting, humanitarian aid to displaced persons, and arms control I can see. But carbon emissions?

Life's too short to drink cheap beer

The merger of Miller and Coors won't have much effect on me. I tend to stick with the good brews.

The newest such brew (see also report by Wileyman) is the Wee Heavy Ale at Vintage 50


Of course, we shouldn't forget The Heart and my old favorite, Old Dominion Brewing Company (in particular, their Oak Barrel Stout).

The Realities of the Rebellion

Chruch Fathers

This actually wasn't one of the better online personality quizzes I have taken, as the answer choices were usually rather limited. Nonetheless, the topic makes it worth posting.

You’re St. Jerome! You’re a passionate Christian, fiercely devoted to Jesus Christ and his Church. You are willing to labor long hours in the Lord’s vineyard, and you have little patience with those who are less willing or able to work as you do. Your passions often carry you into temptation zones of wrath, lust, and pride. Find out which Church Father you are at The Way of the Fathers!